Like a stubborn shadow

you are there

My soul ducks


tiptoes around

so careful not to make a sound

And still I can see

the shadowed grey

of your outline.

I stand next to a roaring train

to drown out

the feel of your steady gaze

on my back

And I feel nothing

but then the train passes

And I can feel you have not left.

To move toward you

Is to confront the hideous fears

that snap against my soul

red eyes, fangs dripping with lust

I shudder and turn away

I cannot.

But then I realize

my soul

is like a river coming to slow terms with winter

first around the edges

then creeping slowly out

until it defies even the torrent of life

rushing through the middle.

What now?

The monster or numbness?

But really

I have no choice

because still I see

that you are following me

You are saying a word to me

that makes my eyes tremble with tears

and I want to

I don’t know if I can


I want to

because you are You.


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